17 Random Facts About Me

  1. I was named after a Starship captain
  2. I was detained at Hong Kong airport for suspected money laundering
  3. I feature in a Chinese public service training video
  4. I’ve seen more shows at the Globe than at the Aotea Centre
  5. I’ve been inside the Great Pyramid of Giza
  6. I went (indoor) rock climbing recently. It was fun.
  7. I did a school science fair project about prime numbers
  8. I was at work at midnight on 31 December 1999, and helped prevent Y2K disasters
  9. I’ve walked on the Great Wall of China. You may have been able to see me from space
  10. I’m more scared of planes taking off than landing
  11. I don’t like spiders, or flying insects
  12. The first full-length play I ever directed was a Shakespeare
  13. I like roadtrips
  14. I’ve written three short film scripts and half a play
  15. I’ve passed out having my blood pressure taken and I do not have blood tests
  16. I like science and maths and read New Scientist
  17. I can or could play the piano, clarinet and the guitar, with varying levels of skill.

The Mystrons

When I was much younger I wrote an epic sci-fi graphic novel. Because talent like this should not be lost to time, I present in all it’s glory – The Mystrons. (Not to be confused with The Mysterons – I assume there was some sort of copyright issue)

(With apologies to Gerry Anderson)

(I suspect NASA did not receive their copy.)

One day when I was putting the milk out I got (hit) by a laser beam. It hit my foot. I did cry. Some more came I hid behind the letter box. Then it stopped. I went back inside. I found that it came from the moon. I wondered how?

It was the next day. I saw a flying saucer. I tried to take a photo of it but when it was developed it was blank. I saw it again I tried to take a photo of it again but the same happened so I did not (try) it again. But then…….

The next day it landed on our drive when I was getting the paper. Then a voice said “This is the voice of the Mystrons”

A ramp came down. A man stepped out. He caught me. I shouted “help”. Russell looked out of his window. He came to help but he got caught as well. They took us in

We bit them they bit us it hurt. They took us into a room and locked us up. The guards came in they came into the room. They left the door open . But if we moved they would shoot us with a gun you would (not) die. But if you moved again you would.

Then the Mystrons started to attack but when we attacked our bullets just blew up so we gave up. They landed and kidnapped everyone they could see.

Meanwhile, on earth they were getting ready to attack. When they were high they took us to the door and made us jump our of the door. The people on earth saw us but didn’t do anything then they noticed who is was and they rescued us

Me and Russell were the only ones on earth because all over the world they were attacking. We ran to Whenuapai airport. We jumped into an Orion but did not know how to drive one we just guessed. We took off we rescued everyone and never landed again.


  • I’m not 100 per cent how old I was – 7 or 8 I think
  • The final page is drawn in crayon. I have no idea why
  • “Russell” was my next door neighbour.